Alli, Ron Paul, and the blog week

June 24, 2007

  Well it was kind of an interesting week here in criminyland.   I learned a bit, laughed a bit, and deleted a hell of a lot of comments.  I want you to know if you are one of those I deleted, it was either you were not creative enough in your profanity, not strident enough in your zealotry, or my dyslexic fingers hit the wrong little circle.  Asta, Brian, my disloyal fingers kept your snarky remarks from appearing on the August pages of this blog.  My apologies.

   I feel I should clarify one more time since it apparently hasn’t manged to insinuate itself through the layers of fat surrounding the frontal lobes of my Alli readers.  Nothing that makes you shit yourself in public is worth doiing this to yourself.  Try to liken it to what Angelina Jolie and Meg Ryan have done to their lips.  It won’t make you better.  It’ll just make more people point to your ass and whisper.  While I agree being overweight is a mojor health issue facing our nation, I can’t help but feel the feeding frenzy I’ve seen over this drug is 90% cosmetic.  I get it.  Your self esteem sucks because you are over weight right? Wrong.  You care so much about what society thinks that you feel bad about yourself. Get over it.  Nothing wrong with a few  rubenesque curves.   The anorexic look so touted by hollywood and the new york runways is not all that attractive.  I suppose homosexual pedophiles find it appealing, but we have congress and prison for people like that.  Good luck on your weight loss, and quit thinking there is a safe easy way to do it.

   I’ve posted some well thought out comments by Ron Paul fans.  I’ve also thrown out several pabst induced diatribes of no social merit.  I found this site to be well written, though I disagreed with him quite strenuously

He proves all ron paul fans are not imbeciles.  another site worth a look is

another Ron Paul fan is Ms. Liberty, and if you like the little video clips she’s good for it.

   On the funny front, you really need to take a look at this fella.  He takes a look at a lot of things from daily life and puts a smile on the face of em.

    For all my liberal friends, and for you conservatives that can laugh at yourself I found a blog that is quite informative.  The only problem you’ll have is if you’re thin skinned.  They put blood in the water early and often in the comments sections.  Asta starts with verbal evisceration  and works backwards from there….fun place

   Out of the blog I managed to get in a late night poker game the other night.  My ride arrived at 10:30 pm saying I don’t knw what that funny thumping sound is.  Amazingly, and you’ll want to know this for future reference, when the air goes out of one of your tires it doesn’t improve the smoothness of the ride.  by the time I fixed it and we drove to the poker game it was almost 1a.m. and the other pasteboard combatants were well and truly drunks.  Here’s another tip.  If you play for money…play against drunks.  Its not even gambling.  I won a little over 100 bucks in about an hour and a half.  Nothing like stealing money from your acquaintances to make you feel good about yourself.

  The horseback ride lasted several hours longer than I preffered.  We had 23 people.  20 of which had never even put a saddle on a horse before.  Add to that it was raining, and my horse despising ass was one unhappy fella.  The horse I was given was named insaba oton which is some indian dialect and means i will smash your head with my hooves and grind your bones to mush as i stomp on your worthless human corpse.  Ir wasn’t even really a horse.  I’m almost certain it was a detusked elephant.  I don’t know if you know this or not, but when a horse won’t take the bit, they have this little pliers doohickey…i think its called a snaffle.  Anyway, you squeeze there upper lip with it and twist, thereby making the horse open its mouth.  Didn’t work with mine.  Whatever synapse was supposed to occur misfired and it made the equine godzilla stand up. I being of good character and having a pure heart was unafraid, and refused to let go.  This friggin throwback wooly mammoth lifted me 4 feet off the ground.  With his lip.  I spent the remainder of the day bouncing around in abject terror on the  back of dumbo, and plotting revenge on gordon. 

    That was the good part of the weekend.  The bad part is coming up.  I have to take my daughter to the mall….clothes shopping. ” i would rather die a thousand deaths.”  Robert E. Lee’s words fit nicely I think.

p.s.  I didnt see the words “uber” or “plethora” on any blogs I went to.  Proving bloggers can be taught.

sunday is for random thoughts #3

June 24, 2007

1.  Imagine my chagrin when I started to listen to classical music and found out it was played on all my favorite cartoons.

2.  Horse tastes a lot like cow.

3.  We should ban all hunting.  it is much more fun to watch animals die of starvation and disease caused by overpopulation.

4.  I wish the government would let me pick what to spend the 1 out of 3 dollars of my earnings that they snatch from me on.  I’d buy a bomb for fallujah.

5.     Droopy, woody woodpecker, and atom ant could so kick sponge bob’s, dexter’s, and chuckie’s asses.

6.    If you treat everyone the way they treat you, you will spend a lot of time alone.

7.  The blog definition of troll is “someone who doesn’t agree with every idiotic thing you think.”

8.  80 American soldiers have died in Iraq in June.  I have no idea how many have died in car accidents, in gun violence, in domestic situations, of diabetes, of cancer, of cirrhosis, of suicide, of drug overdoses, of neglect, of starvation, in work related accidents, or simply by falling.  While all of these are certainly higher numbers, no news organization see’s fit to give me a daily count.

9.    John Stewart and Stephen Colebert have exactly the same reasons to lie to us a Wolf Blitzer and Storm Davis.  They get paid based on popularity.

10.   Cynicism is the commingling of intellect and experience.  If you aren’t cynical you lack one or the other.

11.   Never loan someone money.  If you care enough to loan it to them give it to them.  It saves a lot of frustration.

12.   A loyal dog is a better companion than a disloyal mate.

13.   I’m not sure what that is, but I have an incredible desire to dip my scrotum in it.

14.   If you took the collective good deeds of all the candidates for president and put them in a pile, and then took the net worth of the same group….which would you rather leave to your children?

15.  You have it real good if you’re one of the millions that spend time at work doing non-work oriented things on your computer.  Any reasonable boss would fire you.

16.   You will sometime in the future be lied to by a friend, cheated on by a mate, disrespected by your progeny, or abused or neglected by those who are responsible for your care.  Ain’t life a bitch?

17.   working hard is not half as prosperous as screwing people over, but you can look at yourself in the mirror without saying “damn I’m good.”

18.  Don’t be so angry, so hurt, so despondent.  Doin’t let others change how you see yourself. Don’t join the herd of lemmings you see crossing before you, and never doubt your ability to make a difference.  Now get the hell out of here.  I’m out of random thoughts for today.

postscript:  don’t forget to contact your congresman at   Ron Paul and most other conservatives voted against it, meaning it has to be good for working americans.

how about a little beach erosion money for West Virginia?

June 24, 2007

    Ok, that takes care of the Ron Paul folks.  Lets do the liberals.  While watching the elections I saw a lot of discourse about Earmarks.   No you little spank monkeys…thats not what you get when your lover chews on your lobe.  Its something our elected representatives do when they wish to pull a little pirate action on the public coffers.  They specify the funds for a specific project, and without saying who is requesting the funds publically;  insert it into an appropriations bill.  The bill is voted on, and a list of special projects longer than your mother-in-laws list of complaints about you is passed or rejected.  No vote on the specific project, just a vote on the overall package.

    Now here’s the fun part.  The democrats were gonna clean up congress.  So , just as a guess….who do you think is the shining beacon of hope for ending earmarks.  Why Robert Byrd of course.  You know, the 264 year old senator from West Virginia who during the ocurse of his illustrious career has brought home more pork than the big bad wolf.  Putting this guy in charge of appropriations is like putting Captain Jack Sparrow in charge of the rum cabinet.

     So to my lovable, if a bit profane leftie friends, a question….What exactly does the left have against ending earmarks?

Ron Paul Votes against Employees Free Choice Act

June 24, 2007

    I’m sure this is because he feels government shouldn’t be involved in the free market?  I’m so tired of this little weiner hiding behind that malarkey I could crap a libertarian.

    I think its really just that ol Ron Paul owes big business like the rest of his cronies.  The vote to have government pay for oil exploration offshore was involving Government in the “free market.”  Why not then vote for a bill that will help america’s middle class?  Union labor used to be the base of that middle class, until the government decided it was better for big business to ship the union jobs to Mexico or other third world shitholes.

   So why don’t you Ron Paul fans tell me what exactly it is that Ron Paul has against workers organizing?  you can run your mouths, now try teaching.

to pressure your senator to vote for the employees free choice act use this link.  I know bloggers like to write and talk, and whine…now how about sending your senator a little note?  Maybe have an effect for a change.  They screwed us with NAFTA and GATT…they owe us one.