the book report

The assignment:  Give a two minute presentation on The Giver by Louis Lowry.

The instructions:  Explain why you liked the book, and reasons others your age would like the book.

The questions my daughter asked:  What if I didn’t like the book?  What if the book has no redeeming social value?

The directive:  Well then just make something up.   (Allegedly with a threatening tone).

The decision (as it was put to me):   I’m going to say what I really thought of the book.

My response:   Take something good to read in in school suspension. (smiling, and with just a hint of defeatism).

the book report:  a scathing 2:00 rebuke of a book that ended “but others might like it.”

The question:  Was there anything about the book that you liked?  (Allegedly with a hint of malice.)

The response:  It was short.

   good kid

author’s note:  all errors in this communication related to punctuation, grammar and sentence structure are mine.  The content is as close to exact as I can make it, having had the story related to me by my daughter.


17 Responses to the book report

  1. Anita Marie says:

    If she had cut out the part about ‘others may like it ‘ the report would have been perfect- why?

    Because it was obvious she read it…and she thought about it.

    Good job.

    I’m speaking from personal experiece here…

  2. hi Anita…I think i’d like her even if she wasn’t my kid

    good to see you

  3. Cliff Burns says:

    I love this, kiddo. A little slice of life. One of my sons once said (when he was about 5 years old): “Life is a drawing of God”.

    From out of the mouths of babes…

  4. JanieBelle says:

    HA! Awesome.

    Way to go CriminyMidget!

  5. thank you Cliff…she’ll appreciate the kind words, and its good to see you

    Hi Janie…wait’ll I tell her what you called her. *L* you’re in so much trouble.

  6. Conundrum says:

    I haven’t read the book but the reviews make it seem like a depressing bit of literature that should likely make the readers think…and think seems to be exactly what your daughter did.

    You must be doing something right there as a father.

  7. mostly I just watch con. I raiswd them to be independent, and they are.

  8. Conundrum says:

    Don’t sell yourself short. You raised them to be independent, they are and you succeeded. That’s what you did right.

    Raising thinking and/or independent kids is no small task.

  9. she is so full of herself right now. i let her read the comments to “her” story

    the only problem that seems to be happening, Con, is that they seldom think and act independently at the same time. *s*

  10. max says:

    The only way to properly pull off a weasel out of it close like “but some people might like it” is to give the misguided teacher who assigned the “why I like it” paper a real hard look when you say it. She got the real hard look in right?

    [Real hard looks especially work if you arch one brow a little when you give them.]

    [When you end up in the office for the real hard look be sure and point out Miss Weasel Pants Teacher cannot legitimately fail you merely for not enjoying a piece of derivitive fiction clearly written to appease and astound middle aged school teachers with illusions of literary taste.]

  11. hi max…my delightfully cherubic progeny has no mean face, but she has nearly perfected the criminy smirk. It’s as effective. you must be prescient. i have been invited to attend a discussion group on my daughters attitude, and ability to follow directions.

  12. max says:

    Oh wow this is so your opportunity to ease your daughter’s educational experience. Make really suggestive and lewd statements to the teacher about what she might be wearing under that skirt and her coming back to your place after the conference so you can find out or even better hitting the janitor’s closet. She will be nice to your daughter ever after because of “that terrible father of hers” and you will only have to talk to social services a couple times after. This is so your opportunity to sacrifice yourself for your children you lucky guy.

  13. that’s it Max…encourage the degenerate

  14. max says:

    Hey that teacher’s assignment was “lie to make me happy” and that is not a lesson teachers have any business imposing on impressionable young girls in the public education system especially when it comes to English and literature which are subjective when it comes to tastes and analysis even in academic circles forget classrooms full of teenagers. “Find a reason to like the book” my ass. I would take the ears off a teacher who told a kid of mine to pretend to like a book or face disciplinary action. That is outrageous behavior from an alleged adult and teacher and supervisor of children and not acceptable.

    All kidding aside, lately the only way I see people successfully dealing with unacceptable school authority is to mention lawyers, which seems to slow down people who overestimate themselves because they have exercised power over children too long.

    [This sort of stuff pisses me off.]

  15. Hi Max

    the degenerative I meant was me. I am totally in the kiddoes corner on this, and couldn’t agree with what you said more. She will be needing those ears because she’s going to hear a lot from me this year I’m afraid.

  16. max says:

    Oh good. Do not forget additional ammo, “I am a veteran.” Depending on mind set this will either mean you garner immediate respect as a defender of your country or you garner immediate fear of crazed vets with guns and both are effective.

  17. no kiddin…already handled the incredibly lucid whacko trick a couple years ago. we have armed accompaniment when we talk now. *s*

    incident two occurred today…i’ll fill you in later

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