It’s not prejudice, it’s pride

January 28, 2008

     I think I probably spend to much time paying attention to things not worth the effort.  This election cycle is certainly the most important one in history.  I know this because Wolf Blitzer said so.  What’s really not important is the crap that passes as news on this campaign.  Bill Clinton had it right when he said the fighting and bickering is what the news wants to report on, and so they feed the candidates questions that lead to more bickering, and then stand piously on their pedestals crying “for shame.”

    The race issue was a given.  There is a half black guy in the race, and therefore race will be an issue, because race sells advertising and newspapers.  John McCain lying about Biff Romney’s stance on timetables in Iraq (which most americans supported a few months back) isn’t nearly as juicy as Bill Clinton saying Jesse Jackson won in ’84 and ’88 in Soputh Carolina.  This comment is true, but is delightfully newsworthy because the wonks can call it anti-black code speak.

   Now, calling Bill a racist is like calling David Duke a champion of minority rights, but reality isn’t at issue.  What’s at issue is how can we wring every bit of drama we can out of a primary that is rapidly turning into the equivalent of a chowhall food fight.  Bill isn’t a racist, and anyone that doubted black South Carolina would vote for Obama should probably hearken back to the 80’s when they twice voted for Jesse Jackson. 

   Meanwhile,  coservative groups are robocalling as fast as their 486’s can pound out the calls to tell everyone who will listen what a bad bad black hater Clinton is. 
Now why would the conservatives do that?  Is it because they believe Barack is a much easier foe than Hillary?  I do, and I’m your basic dull normal midwesterner.  The Clnton’s are a formidable opponent.  Barack on the other hand hasn’t proven that he will be.

    I remember watching him at the Convention in 2004 and thinking “there stands the first black president of the United States.  I didn’t know he was half black or I may have called him the first brown president.    I also didn’t know he would risk that possibility by running before he could walk.  He is a first term senator from Illinois.   His self proclaimed experience on the world stage was a trip to Africa as a youth, and this may or may not be enough for him to traverse the labyrinth of international issues facing America’s next president.  Awww, hell, thats a damn lie.  there is no way he is ready.

    So the phrase used in this title is being bandied about by the experts/idiots on all the news shows.  I believe it.  I don’t think blacks vote for Barack because they hate whites, though in many cases that may be the case.  You would be hard pressed to find anyone that would admit it if they did, and there is nothing wrong with racial pride anyway.  I especially like the kind of racial pride that causes blacks to lambaste the only president that really did anything for them.  Don’t tell me about LBJ.  His racism IS a matter of public record.

   I like Barack.  I think he has the best intentions, and I think he really believes he can make a difference.  The reason I won’t vote for him though isn’t my racial pride.  It’s that the chunky chick with the big butt has proven she can go to war with the scoundrels and malcontents that infest the halls of congress.  She has also proven that she knows it requires breaking eggs to make an omelette, and for better or worse that will mkae her the most entertaining president if not the most effective.  I’ve long since given up hope that any of them have a clue how to put the dirt back in the hole they’ve dug for us. 

   For those of you who say Hillary had nothing to do with the success of the Clinton Administration and therefore has no right to take credit for it I say this.  You’ve never been married if you believe that.


Ron Paul Turns in a big number in polls, and other News I like

August 4, 2007

  I think it’s probably wrong to keep your dead ex’s body next to your bed.  The dead don’t deserve that type of disrespect.  I am ok with the use of tzxidermy to keep your loved ones around after they pass.  I think just a head mount would be in pooor taste, but a full body mount doesn’t seem unsound.

Raise your hand if this is news to you.  If you have one hand up raise the other one and hit yourself in the head.

All right ladies, don’t get mad.  Oh go ahead.  You don’t need the money.  this comes as a surprise to me.  I always found angry female bosses about as good to have as angry mail bosses, just with breasts.  I think i would pay them more. 

Crazy History Geeks try to blow up the Queen Mary II.  Ok, no they didn’t, but can you imagine how the guy who made this bust must of been rushing?  Possible terror attack, (which apparently every story is now automatically tagged with), and it turns out to be 3  members of the Turtle Historical Club?

I’m glad really.  I wish to see if a major metropolitan area’s voting bloc will complain about being constantly under surveillance.  This should be interesting based on how concerned they are about someone listening to their phone calls

Ron Paul comes out swinging like bonds is the latest newsweek poll.  I mean bonds on his current i can’t hit shit streak of course.  Ron Paul’s whopping 2% of those polled hsould have the faithful clamoring for his ascension into heaven.  Man the euphoria should be bouncing around headquarters like they’re on an XTC binge.

Bush’s poll numbers now on a historical par with Truman, Carter, and Nixon.  Let’s take a moment to consider this.  Truman dropped an atomic bomb, and ruled with an iron fist through the post war economic disaster, Nixon violated the law on several levels and had to resign, and Carter was the honest Brack Obama, although brighter, of the 70’s.

a cat story for my readers from icanhazcheeseburger…not what you had in mind was it? Kitty got his ass kicked.  That should piss off the peta patrol.

I went here to find out what pop tarts had to do with Hiedi Klums bosom.  You”ll see why I feel like a dumbass when you click on the link.  If you don’t, then you’re an even bigger dumbass than I.

See this is where you see the difference between strategy and tactics.  Remember this as the week Barack Obama lost the nomination.  Unless of course he gets a note from his doctor saying he was on psychotropic drugs and had lost all touch with reality.  What an asswit.

 and thats good news friday.  i didn’t even have to use the bridge, the dog mauling, or the kid cooking in its car seat stories.  What a lovely thing is technology.  We now really do know way more than we really wish to.

Hillary “da rack” Clinton rode her cleavage to a huge lead on the democrat side of the poll…See the Ron Paul link above.  I only added this because I wanted to call hillary “da rack” which rhymes with barack, and is a hell of a start for one of those kill whitey rap ditties.


The YouRtubes debates, revisited

July 28, 2007

    So the new hue and cry is the Republican candidates are scared to debate on YouTube.  I for one do not blame them.  I think from a strategic standpoint those candidates currently refusing to attend the debate do so with a level of acute awareness often missing in the politicians of today.

   Before the debate has even started Mitt Romney is being accused of saying that he thinks it’s undifnified to be questioned by the general public.  The fact that he said nothing close to this is irrelevant because YouTubes have a huge problem with reading comprehension, and think that cesspool the other night was a fine example of democracy at work.  What he said was he thought (I paraphrase) the office of president should be held to a higher level than to have to be asked questions by a snowman.  I concur.  Ratings are important to CNN, and since it is their editors that chose the questions we have to assume that ratings came into play when choosing the snowman question.  I’m quite sure one of the other 3000 questions could have addressed global warming just as well.  Some level of decorum should be maintained, and lets face it, the global warming snowman was as much about ratings as the psychopath with the assault rifle.

   Additionally, the benchmarks in Iraq debate will be in full roar in September, and this is almost certainly the reason those not electing to attend have chosen that course of action.  Contrary to what this mullet has to say:

Added state Republican spokeswoman Erin VanSickle: “It’s an important debate in an important battleground state that just moved its primary to Jan. 29th. In other words, we have every confidence that they will attend. They can’t afford not to.” (same link as above). 

While I’m sure Florida will be important, it always is, I don’t think being swamped with questions about their Iraq positions will be good for any of the candidates.  McCain has chosen to attend, as has Ron Paul.  McCain needs a metaphoric homerun to win, and Ron Paul is on the right side of the war issue.  Hard to blame either of them.  The rest are not desperate enough to go to Florida and be sandbagged by CNN.

   It’s not about you tube, although the wretchedly insipid crowd hanging out in the political arena there are absolutely sure there voice is the only one that matters.  What matters is that several little CNN gnomes will be picking and choosing the questions, and quite likely stuffing the clip box as they do so.  It’s not hard to imagine some little editor having a buddy send in a sleeper clip that they can smear a Republican candidate with.  How about in the interest of fairness we have a FOXNEWS/YouTube.com debate? 

    I’m not raising a conspiracy theory here.  CNN has long been known for its softballing interviews with democratic leaders while hammering away at conservatives.  It’s easy to se it happen when you think both liberals and conservatives are worng, but I may be the only person left that believes that. The debate for the democrats barely touched on Iraq because quite simply thats not news at a democratic debate.  They all profess desire to be out of the war, and everyone knows they aren’t doing anything about it.  The republicans on the other hand primarily support some form of presence in Iraq, and I would surmise that based on the timing of the debate, CNN has every intention of using the benckmarks as a club to wield at the candidates.

    Smart move Romney, Giuliani, Thompson, et al.  No point putting your head in a noose today in hopes of being reincarnated in time for the elections.


Why the Republican CNN/YouTube debate was postponed

July 28, 2007

  While surfing all my favorite we love Ron Paul and never listen to reason sites I found this little tidbit of knowledge.  There was also a lot of rhetoric about the reason it is being postponed is they fear Ron Paul.  This of course is not the case.  The only possible reason for postponing this debate is this.

Thats right.  The republican strategists get their news and opinions from CriminyJicket more than from any other source.


Not News….Proof

July 26, 2007

  This one proves that the FBI is not on a witch hunt for terrorists.  Anyone will do.  It doesn’t seem to matter when in history, the FBI has proven to be as unscrupulous as any federal agency ever.

this one proves that no good deed goes unpunished.  The president who helped pull south africa out of apartheid is now being victimized by rumor mongers and former apartheid officials trying to keep the noose from around their own neck.  Apparently a nobel peace prize isn’t worth much anymore.

 Remember the movie where if you watch it the phone rings and you then die within 7 days?  Well, this cat gives you roughly 4 hours.  I don’t know about you, but I’ve always thought cats were satans minions, except max, of course, and this fat little furbearing feline proves it.  I want his feet tested.  Maybe he isn’t prescient…maybe he has poison paws.

This proves that science fictions and comic books are no longer the private domain of the geeky and nerdified.  heh…sure it does.

this proves that sex, funny, and liberal are popular in the blog bowl.  (like toilet bowl….beats blogosphere wouldn’t you say?)  It also proves that If Rosie O’donnell’s haiku’s get an A rating the rest of you haiku clowns should maybe throw in the towel.  It lists a bunch of celebs and what their blogs are about, and then grades them.

this proves that diet and companionship are more relevant to longevity than stress.

   This one proves that not raising taxes and having a universal health care package are the centerpiece of the liberal candidates agenda.  Pay particular attention to how detailed Chris Dodd is in his explanation about how it will be paid for.

this proves that politicians are dumb…they worry about this, when we have problems right now need fixing

this one proves that not only do governments waste oodles of dollars, idiots that write don’t always get their facts straight.  William Proxmire was a senator from Wisconsin, dummy.

While I certainly don’t get it, this proves that holy week is more important than drinking green beer.  Catholics make no sense at all.


the debate (the criminy perspective)

July 24, 2007

  Well, that was fun.  It wasn’t a debate.  It was a forum, but thats a semantic thing.  I have a few observations.  Some of them might even come off as intelligent.  We’ll see.

The I look presidential, I sound presidential, and I will be the next president award goes to (someone just shoot me now) Hillary Clinton.  She did look presidential…except for the female and we’ve never had a female president thing  I was pretty impressed by her.  I still don’t like her, but you have to admit the pantyline made her seem more human.  I would bet against anyone that underestimates her. 

Universal healthcare may be the hammer that destroys the democratic party.  How about limiting it to health care for the indigent, children, elderly and handicapped?

The I don’t really know how this works award goes to Barack Obama for saying he would directly meet with Chavez,Castro, Kim Jong Il, Assad, and Ahmadinejad.  Hillary and Edwards we’re quick to jump on the diplomatic faux pas.  It worries me a little that I knew all their names…my memory should be shot by now.

Who I could vote for award goes to – Joe Biden.  He makes sense.  He’s been around the block, he isn’t some rich fat cat looking to pad his fortune, and he’s been serving this country through a ton of personal strife.  I like the idea of partitioning Iraq, since there is no other idea that has any chance of working.  If it wasn’t for his voting record in congress he’d be the man.  I loved “If thats your baby, you need help” and the followup “I hope he doesn’t come looking for me.”  I also like his position on troops to Darfur

The “surprise criminy” award goes to Bill Richardson for not reciting his diplomatic resume no matter what the question was about.

The I not only look crazy I am crazy award goes to Dennis Kucinich for suggesting that people alive today deserve reperations for something that ended 142 years ago.

The I’m in control (anyone remember Alexander Haig) award goes to Anderson Cooper.  This is no Wolf Blitzer.  He handled things as moderator impeccably.  This guy really never looks bad no matter what he is doing, and I can think of a gazillion journalists(sycophants) that need to watch him and try to emulate him.  If you don’t believe me go over to you tube and get a copy of Sean Hannity’s interview with Huffington.  He is the only idiot on the planet that could make her look intellectual.

The whineass award goes to Mike Gravel…even though i really like this guy.  The reason you are not asked a lot of questions is because you are a marginal candidate.  I liked his firm stance on the died in vain controversy.  I know it’s hard to take, but if you die fighting for a cause, and have no affect on future events…then you probably from that perspective died in vain.

I’m not giving chris dodd an award.  I’m just going to say that I was wrong to judge this guy by his behaviour in senate hearings.  He’s lucid, earnest, and has a reasonable vision for the future if you remove all the stupid I have to say this to please my base rhetoric.  Nice job Chris.

minor notes:

I think it’s cute how they all rail against special interests and corporations.  I particularly liked the corporate carbon penalty idea.  What I think a lot of people don’t realize is that the more we regulate our industries, and force them to pay the costs…the less able they are to compete in the global market that these same public officials created.  I know it sounds good, but we are flat getting our asses kicked in global trade, and it’s because the countries that are eating our lunch are not being regulated the way we are.

Bill Richardsons 40K minimum wage for teachers.  That sounds nice don’t it…ok…i have a confession…I’ve been working at my current job since January.  I will make substantially more than 40K this year.  Here comes the good part.  I’m a painter.  I don’t know about you, but I think a society that pays its teachers less than it pays its painters deserves whatever fate hell can dream up for it.

I want to find fault with healthcare for illegal aliens but i can’t.everyone should receive medical attention if they need it, and under current law, believe it or not…you do.  Hospitals can not refuse to treat you.  They can transfer you to another facility, but you have to be treated.  Insured or not.  In theory.

   The gay marriage issue I’m going to do a flip flop on.  It’s not governments business.  I think what Obama said was right.  If churches wish to honor gay marriage thats fine.  It is a civil matter.  I do think that they should have all the same rights and privileges as married couples, but think they should have all the same costs.  Once entered into a civil union they should have to get a divorce to break it, and pay all the appropriate alimonies child support etc that the court deems appropriate .  Thats what I call getting kissed before you get f%$ked.

I thought it was nice of all these wonderful religious people to think it’s okay for people not to be religious, and to think they should still have a voice in our society.  It was very inclusive of them. *smack*

All in all it was entertaining.  Some of it was funny, some of it was sad, some of it was just plain stupid.  A typical presidential candidate forum.


not really newsworthy

July 23, 2007

   Lets start with tonights debate.  The spin machine is pumping out what a new and different thing the You Tube debate will be.  Ok, tell me how?  Because “you” are asking the questions.  Lets look at that.  Over 2000 clips have been submitted according to CNN.  Obviously, they don’t have time in two hours to ask 2000 questions.  How do we pare it down?  Well, lets have CNN’s editors do it.  Out of 2000 maybe 30 will be used.  It’s not much of a stretch to imagine that the 30 will be those that CNN wants asked.  The only input you have is whether you wear a silly hat, or hold your stupid fleabitten cat while you ask it.  This is the first debate sanctioned by The Democratic National Committee this election cycle.  What to expect?  I think John Edwards and Barack Obama have to be more aggressive.  Edwards because if he doesn’t he is dead, and Barack just to show that he is capable of it.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nf/20070723/tc_nf/54047

   I wonder which $2000 suit wearing reject allowed the Republican debate to be held in September?  Seems to me something real serious is going down in terms of Iraq that month, and it is likely to turn the Republican debate into a free for all.  Which is good for the viewers, and for Ron Paul, but it sandbags the hell out of the hawks on stage.  If I we’re Giuliani, McCain, and Romney I’d be mad as hell.  Why?  Well, do you think much is going to change in the next month and a half in Iraq?  Yeah, me either.  The Republican governors say its no big deal that their isn’t a front runner.  They may be right.  Conservatives are notoriously tight with their campaign funding until it shakes out, meaning they’ll be lots of money for the stretch run, and the geneal election.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070723/ap_on_el_pr/republican_governors_2;_ylt=Ag.2ypj8XxumGruFLpERpQgL1vAI

   Have you paid your “support dead farmers” tax?  In a 7 year period over $1.1 billion in subsidies was paid to dead farmers.  The U.S. Department of Agriculture pays out over 40% of claims without any review process at all.  In most cases they rely on the farm corporations to inform them of a death.  They say staff shortages and competing priorities are to blame.  Another government agency tossing your money out the window, and generally to people one hell of a lot richer than you.   Don’t believe me? Read the article.  They’re spending money you could be putting away for your childs tuition to subsidize giant farm companies worth millions.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19912382/

I was reading this and started doing the math.  .09 cents is 3%.  That means you now pay roughly $3.00 for a cup of coffee?  Oh man, you deserve to be bent over and rammed by Starbucks.  That’s pretty much the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19918485/

Obama, Osama, and Chelsea’s Momma?  Well isn’t that clever.  I can understand Mitt’s argument.  He isn’t responsible for his followers, and during photo ops you can’t really stop and check every sign.  Further, this is kinda funny.  Still, if you’re Mitt Romney, you might not want to give anyone any more reason to wonder about you.  I know the Mitt fans are going to hate that comment, but he’s on decidedly thin ice anyway, and I see no reason to hand the guy with the gun some bullets.  The Mormon vote can’t get him elected, so he might want to make sure and not alienate “others” with stupid photo op tricks.

http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/

Lil Wayne and Ja Rule got arrested Sunday night on weapons charges.  Lil Wayne also got zapped with drug charges.  I really have to know.  What is with hip hop stars these days? Do they think they’re in the NFL?

http://www.cnn.com/2007/SHOWBIZ/Music/07/23/rappers.arrested/index.html

You may not like him, But nobody packs a punch in publishing like Harry Potter.  The latest book “harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows sold 8.3 million hardcover copies in the U.S. in the first 24 hours.  That shatters the old record of 6.9 copies of…yep, The Half Blood Prince.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,290346,00.html

The worst flooding in 60 years in Great Britain.  I’m not surprised.  Al Gore has not done enough to stop Global Wetting, and now you see the consequences.  Had he not spent so much time inventing the internet this tragedy could easily have been prevented.

http://www.mail.com/newsarticle.aspx?catId=3&articleId=1147296

whoops…i bet this guy supports gay marriage now. This is pretty funny stuff. His wife got licked, and he got stuck.

http://www.mail.com/NewsArticle.aspx?catId=2&articleId=1147225&newssiteid=1


time to schmooze the news (the blog effect)

July 20, 2007

  Well, it has finally come to pass that the largest special interest group in the country has a chance to take a stand against the federal government.  The Fiasco in Florida has again reared its ugly head in the news, and the polydactyl purrers at Hemingway House are again being threatened by that ever popular government Leviathan, the USDA.  Don’t these guys have beef to inspect? Why the hell are they messing with Snowball’s Descendants.  It’s time for the AARP…no, not that special interest group, dummie, the ICHC (i can haz cheeseburger) members to step up to the plate and let the government know where they stand.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20070718/od_nm/usa_hemingway_cats_dc_1;_ylt=AqeAoF10R8BllG6xhSIYQUoL1vAI

 I’ve talked about this whole deal before.  Why is it okay to steal someone else’s work and post it on the net?  Worse, why do mainstream media outlets feel its okay?  I haven’t peeked, because I already know I’m right, but it is reprehensible that what this lady has worked so long on has been stolen by a couple of jerk off bloggers and posted on the web. These two clowns are why the phrase Spare the rod and spoil the child used to hold sway  on parenting methods.  The reviewers should have been fired, not published.  By the way, Harry Potter does not get swallowed by a giant white whale while smuggling hashish out of turkey.

http://www.eonline.com/news/article/index.jsp?uuid=fa85329c-22d2-401d-8625-b526f2ead532&entry=index&sid=rss_topstories&utm_source=eonline&utm_medium=rssfeeds&utm_campaign=rss_topstories

who hasn’t felt like doing that.  I like to think of this story as the criminy effect.  If you’ve never thought of doing this I’ll send you a gift certificate to your favorite restaurant.  I will need affidavits from at least 231 close friends or reletives that can verify your claim.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20070717/od_nm/germany_computer1_dc_1;_ylt=AqpXqizjXLFVXEViUUghUPAL1vAI

so lets tax smokers only to pay for childrens health care.  Hey, great Idea, and then we’ll tax fags to pay for M-16s, and women to pay for hooker testing in Vegas, and blacks to pay for slavery reperations.  What a government we have…what annoys me about this one is many of you are saying “let’s do it, I don’t smoke”

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19827784/

  File this one under the internet should not be regulated.  Of course sexual predators give that comment 100% support, but maybe parents won’t after reading this story.  Child exploitation is big business on the web, and actually going after the kids is getting even bigger.

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/07/19/sexual.photos.ap/index.html

  I bet Fox News hated reporting this one, but the left has to be feeling pretty froggie.   It claims that Hillary and Barack beat every republican candidate.  Sorry pauliacs, if Ron can’t beat Hillary he should go back to texas.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,289970,00.html

and thats the news from me.    Pakistan is doing what I said it would.  So is Iraq, so is pretty much everything else.  The news continues to be morbid on the domestic violence front.  I leave it alone because I like to joke, and there just isn’t anything funny about it.  We teach children to keep their hands to themselves, but apparently its a lesson to soon forgotten by adults.


lets do the news

July 17, 2007

  first the really important story…It’s a human interest story from the Grape Gazette.

Roscoe, fluffy and mollie seem to be hitting it off.  In fact I’m almost certain there may be a little inter-species lesbian thing going on if you know what I mean.  Roscoe is happy because someone speaks his language, mollie is happy because she has someone to snuggle with, and If I’m not mistaken the two of them being happy means FLUFFY IS A FREAK.

Maybe the rat bastards won’t kill me and grill me after all.

   the new intelligence estimate is out.  I’m willing to bet half of the readers here could’ve done as well.  Why do they always play politics with our security?  you would think on this at least they would all speak with one voice.  they can’t though.  You can’t be the most important if you agree with someone else.   Here’s the link…you shouldn’t bother…nothing new here

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070717/ap_on_go_ca_st_pe/us_terror_threat_39;_ylt=AjjTS5Ima.DS.aCafPZKAGsL1vAI

  Pakistan is trying to take the lead in the death by suicide bombing category from Iraq.  Man what a mess they are, and our assistant secretary of state is calling for more military action from Pervez .  Man, we do have some seriously militaristic type s running our country.  Unfortunately, the ruling party in the congress (the democrats) have no balls, so it will continue.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070717/ap_on_re_as/pakistan_74;_ylt=AjbIywqw550DxJcms7ct2jyWwvIE

I don’t know about you, but I love poker.  I’m a huge 7 card stud fan, but the game of choice has become texas hold ’em.  Probably because any idiot can figure it out.  It’s preschool poker, but its big time money.  The world series of poker main event final table is playing, and the winner is going home over $8M richer.  Only Lee Watkinsoon is recognizeable, and the players come from all over the globe.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19777938/

Harry Potter book available in its entirity online.  ok, this is really cool.   First….read the blue box on the left with the guys picture on it.  Then read the story.  Then go, well what the hell does that ….

http://redtape.msnbc.com/2007/07/pirates-say-the.html

In keeping with the Bush Administrations policy of attacking anyone anytime, parachutists jumped on the fremont prison in colorado.  I think its about time we attacked colorado.  whats interesting is these guys, when asked for identification gave the guards a paper that said they were defense department employees…that may not seem like much to you civilians, buut any former military man or woman reading this is going HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,289551,00.html

A pro wrestling story just for MDVP..its the chris benoit thing, and it lays out a pretty good run on how it all went down…Yes, he had steroids in his system

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/07/17/wrestler.murder/index.html

  I told you text messaging was from hell.  This story is one you gotta see…then tell your kids to watch it.

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2007/07/17/snow.texting.and.driving.cnn

Obama girl vs. giuliani girl…this is pretty dumb, but I’ve never linked to booty on my blog so here yuh go

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/offbeat/2007/07/16/moos.obama.rudy.affl

maybe the first step toward proving me right, Iran and the U.s will hold direct talks about Iraq in Baghdad.  The pauliacs will hate this, and Ron Paul must be shuffking his scare mongering feet a little too.

http://www.cnn.com/2007/POLITICS/07/17/us.iran.iraq.ap/index.html

ok, that does it for the news…lots of murders, a dude burned his wife to death, Michael Vick indicted for dog fighting (what an asswit he is), those nurses accused of spreading HIV in children in libya are getting their death sentences commuted to life in prison, etc. etc.  It just oges on.  I think next time I do the news I’ll only do the good stuff.  Which means this post would’ve been one paragraph long


Not really news, but fun anyway

July 10, 2007

here are some stories that probably affect you not in the least.  That’s what’s known as good news, even if it’s not so good news for those it happened to.

http://www.mail.com/newsarticle.aspx?catId=1&articleId=1131088

i like this one for its irony.  Some would say that Mexico is America’s sinkhole.

http://www.mail.com/newsarticle.aspx?catId=3&articleId=1131217

aww those frisky Canadians.  Canada’s imperialistic intentions raise there ugly head in this delightful article about the arctic, and a rock.  The Danes and whatever you call greenland people do not think it’s funny, and the U.S. isn’t all for it either.  A private message to the canadian President.  Don’t get pimp slapped.  We’re almost odne in our other two wars, and I’ve long advocated an attack on you.  My reasoning?  You’re closest.

http://www.mail.com/NewsArticle.aspx?catId=2&articleId=1131128&newssiteid=1

astronaut chat looks familiar.  I don’t know about you, but when I wish to talk to someone I just walk up and pepper spray them.  Carrying a hammer is also useful, and nothing quite like a ginsu for a conversation starter.

http://www.mail.com/NewsArticle.aspx?catId=2&articleId=1130720&newssiteid=1

you don’t have a snowballs chance in Buenos Aires.  What a day this must of been for the kids. anyone under 94 hasn’t seen this there.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20070709/od_nm/pamplona_women1_dc_1;_ylt=AuVfgWUzDajUY0a2nMjiiYUL1vAI

equal rights in Pamplona.  In america, Running with the cows is known as “buffet style dining”

http://www.mail.com/NewsArticle.aspx?catId=3&articleId=1131177&newssiteid=1

how nice…prosecutors can be so understanding.  22 years in prison, DNA clears him, and the prosecutor in a generous move decides not to retry the guy.  I hope he ends up owning New Jersey

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/07/09/hemingway.cats.ap/index.html

I can haz 6 toes?  The folks at icanhazcheeseburger may have been scooped here… Ernest Hemingways house gets to keep its cats…USDA defeated.  This may well be the only cat story I ever reference.  (CNN hard at it again)

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,288724,00.html

cure smoking , and drinking, and gambling…the addiction pill.  varenicline has proven effective against smoking, and now maybe drinking.  I wonder if it cures being addicted to bad relationships…that sucker would really sell..its from pfizer, I saw no mention of crapping your pants.   (foxnews)

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19650857/site/newsweek/

this isn’t news.  this has been going on for a long time, from mcdonalds glasses with lead in the paint to color crayons, the chinese have never been real concerned about consumer safety.  This isn’t fun news, this is I told you so.  (msnbc)