Now Read this…no….really…you’ll lol

September 1, 2007

 While I’ll grant that she has done some scurrilous things in her time,  I’ve still managed to tolerate Bagel like I would a dull normal step-sister.  I’ve been tricked into watching 7 minute long youtube’s that lead to suicide , Have had cat’s attached henceforth and forevermore to my blog, and listened to her whine about how hard she’s worked.

   Well, apparently the she-satan of Ration Reality has decided to make it up to me.  She has written an absolute gem of a piece translating Rap music into normal english.  It looks like quite possibly years of research went into this, and probably copious quantities of narcotics.  All of this on  whatever a housewife can save up from the grocery money and turning a trick or two on the weekend.

  I’ve read a lot of very funny stuff here at wordpress, but this is almost transcendant…you should probably have a look.  Or not.  you reading it won’t increase my income nor my enjoyment of the article, so I really couldn’t give a shit less.

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Your Tax Dollars at Work

July 27, 2007

   I’m curious as to whether this would happen under the constitutional government envisioned by Ron Paul.  I’d also like to know where all of the candidates stand on this issue, and would seriously hope that all of them would state there views publically and for the record.  I know Ron Paul is for smaller government, but is he also for smaller members? I also know that the federal government sends millions of our tax dollars to the states every year for law enforcement.  With good reason.  Heinous crimes like the one in this link are perpetrated every day in our society, and I don’t think we have even scratched the surface of this problem.

   If we can afford to spend Billions on the war in Iraq, The war on poverty, the war on drugs, the war on whatever the hell we want, then I think we should start a new war.  The war on masturbation.  I think this fine officer could be the New Whack-off Czar, in the newly formed Chicken-chokers Enforcement Agency.

   I’m serious.  All you spank monkeys better watch your ass.  We’re coming for you.  Ron Paul is going to nip this shit in the bud when he becomes president.  I envision a new constitutional amendment just for you self-lusting pervoids.   We’re going to put you in the newspaper and let your poor old grandma read about you in between her self-love sessions, and when we catch her she’s going in a cell with you.

I’m ashamed of this article, but I just couldn’t help myself.  You  bone beaters better organize.

I didn’t mention women in this article because women don’t masturbate.