Al Qaeda: Hiring the Handicapped

February 2, 2008

  I must preface this with a mild dose of skepticism.  While I’ve little doubt they would be willing to do anything to further their  ambitions (much like our president, both houses of congress, the supreme court, and a lits of churches, industry leaders, and almost  every woman I’ve ever dated), this one seems a bit dubious on the surface.  Read this

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080202/ap_on_re_mi_ea/iraq_080119205359;_ylt=AkEHAJPMqXo0vyOcPVe43ymWwvIE

It seems to me that if this just happened this morning, and assuming that even retards turn to jello when detonated, I find it a little hard to imagine they could already know what they claim to know.    Anyway, it seems that Al Qaeda may have come up with a new special olympics event.


Ron Paul on Bill O’Reilly discussing the Middle East

September 11, 2007

It's really hard to add to this. Does it really sound like good policy? I'm inclined to agree with Bill here. That doesn't mean I'm against a redeployment of forces (preferably to Tehran), but getting out of the middle east would be suicidal. Ron does stick to his beliefs though. A reasonably sound piece of journalism here. No attacks particularly, and Ron was allowed to present his facts.


Maliki and Chavez..cut one loose and the other up

August 22, 2007

    I only read this article because I think Maliki is stump dumb, and deserves whatever happens to him when we withdraw.  I haven’t seen him travelling to Sunni led nations trying to get them to pressure the Sunni faction in Iraq back into the government.  Instead, he has wandered from Iran to Syria, the two nations fomenting the insurrectionists in Iraq, and by all accounts assisting to destabilize the Iraqi government.

    I agree with him though.  I agree that it is not for us to dictate to his government, and I agree he can find other friends.  therefore it only makes sense that we go ahead and get out of there and let him do so.  He’ll be either dead or Amadinejads bitchboy in a week.  The only thing keeping Iraq anywhere near stable is the American military.  The Iraqi parliament refuses to make any tough decisions, and there languishing and vacationing has wasted whatever security the surge was supposed to buy them.

   It’s time to let them take care of themselves.  They haveo ver 300,000 security forces, and it can hardly be our fault that they are inept and cowardly.  Let the dogs have it.  It serves us no useful purpose anyway.  In fact, I’m for withdrawing for the middle east entirely, and just telling them that any nation that is found to have supported or harbored terrorists will be attacked with tactical nukes.  Fuck ’em.  Whether anyone likes it or not, we’re a fairly formidable nation when we don’t have our head squarely lodged in our asses, and its about time we started exhibiting that.  Who really gives a rats ass if Iraq  turns into another Cambodia?  If we need oil so bad we can always head south and pummel that petty dictator Hugo Chavez.  He wants to nationalize Venezuela, and I’m thinking we should give it statehood.

   It’s more than a little disconcerting, and totally disgusting to see our leaders pandering to these petty provincial cocksuckers.  They have no power, their nations are insignificant, and the sum total of benefit the world gains from these nations even existing is zero.  Neither has ever done one thing to improve the global situation, and both are fast becoming major liabilities to peace and stability.  Blame Bush if you want, but Iraq was a cesspool before bush, it is a shit pit during Bush, and it will be a scat pond after Bush.  Shit floats, so we can leave and they’ll be just fine.

   In closing, let me add, Mr. Bush says we are killing 1500 terrorists and subversives a month.  Thats because you’re a nancy boy, Mr. President.  This should’ve been done and over a long time ago, but you don’t have the testicles that Harry Truman had.


the week sans pictures

July 22, 2007

   Well, my daughter came home from Brown county.  They went horseback riding, and she greeted me with “dad you just have to get me that horse.”  When I responded that their was no way in hell I was getting a horse she said “well Kelsey’s cat had kittens….can I have one of those?”  Girls think they are so smart, but following on the heels of the $100 gorilla trick I wasn’t falling for it.  NO CATS.  Unless they are on a plate smothered in hollandaise sauce is a hard and fast rule in my house.

   I have decided on a Toyota Carolla as my car of the future, and the future is now.  My reasoning is its relatively inexpensive, has four doors, and  should last at least twenty years. By which time I have every intention of being part of the bar at O’malleys.

   Mollie and I dined on tostitos and cheese sauce with jalapenos and Rotel.  In a few short hours we should be lying in virtual agony staring miserably at each other.  I will teach her to quit eating my food even if it kills me.  What kind of friggin dog eats dried, rolled, pressed, salted corn for christsake?

i found some funny stuff.  In fact this one had me rollin.  I’ve been to the blog before, and it tends to be quite amusing.  This one was absolutely delightful though.

and then there is this one.  I like her wit, sarcasm, and wry biting editorializing on all things human.  Some very funny real life kinda stuff here.

   I see pakistan is making the news regularly now.  Wolf “asswind” Blitzer was trying to goad their foreign minister into saying something bad about the relationship with the U.S. Government.  He failed, mainly because the foreign minister blamed our media for the relationship problem.  It was pretty funny.  Wolf Blitzer couldn’t get a 6 year old to say “I want ice cream.”  He then tried to hammer on the Iraqi Deputy prime minister about their parliament going on break.  The DPM patiently explained to the nimrod that their parliament is kind of like our congress and does whatever idiotic thing pops into their collective ADD hampered brains.  I saw it live, but you can probably find the clips by typing “Hippo assfeathers and other idiotic things” into your browser window.  If that doesn’t work try “shitferbrains” or “CNN’s talking sphincter muscle.” 

I’m sure these will work because someone got to Criminy’s house of inanity by typing in “the journey of a tampon.”  Other great or near great search engine hits this week are “penguin javelin” (i think they were looking for D. Peace), gump &co khomeini (no idea), i have to pee so so badly ( i know why, i just don’t understand WHY?), and this just in “diet tampons.” Try one…wash it down with a diet soda for the apex in culinary disgust.

  I wrote a post on how Ron Paul could become President.  It included likely things like him taking barack Obama as a running mate.  The pauliacs seemed to think it all made sense, which pleased me because I thought I had at least two bats loose from the belfry whilst I wrote it.  To prove my theory was utterly preposterous, Ron came in with another rousing 2% poll number today.  I swear, that campaign is on fire.  He’s no John McCain, but maybe if they toss some petrochemicals on it they can be.  BTW, they crowed about how much better than McCain (who IS virtually dead) Dr. Paul was doing….McCain got 20 %.  Which means you won’t hear about this poll anywhere but here, because they only report well fabricated good news.

   I wonder if i can get the Toyota in a nice periwinkle?  Laugh trogs, I have a purple beretta.  Anything is possible if you set your mind to it.

Contrary to what you are reading all over the blog, President dipshits latest executive orders don’t mean any more than the others.  You can protest the war, they’ll torture whoever they damn well feel like, and people in topeka will continue to dream about living someplace nice like Guam.  These were not earth shattering changes in policy.  They were legalistic manifesto’s with maybe some historical significance.  Hard to blame him.  How would you like to be him in a history book 20 years from now.

In sports the National Felony League continues its meteoric rise to the top of the sports infamy list with that humane society poster child Mikey Vick.  He’s like the 40th football player arrested this year.  My only problem with the hue and cry on this is that people seem surprised.  People are being payed millions to play a game, are spoiled rotten, worshipped by agents, fans, and sport monkeys on ESPN, and then we wonder why they act like a bunch of rotten kids.

  In the NBA, an official has been caught betting on games he refereed.  Like a true American instead of taking his lumps he is talking about naming names.  Like the whole world doesn’t know organized professional athletics aren’t crooked as hell?  This doesn’t even belong on the news.  I want the names from the hooker book…Larry Flynt says he may release all 30 at once, and we’ll be stunned.  Yeah, I’m gonna be stunned because some pathetically disgusting politician is getting his crotch rocket juiced by a hooker.  That’ll happen. 

   Last but not least, for the last time Dick Cheney is not satan.  Satan is a girl scout compared to this guy.  I kind of like   him.  He’s like the chancre sore you appreciate when your great aunt edna the mouth kisser visits.


The Ron Paul Fascination

July 21, 2007

    Well, nothing like a long day of work and coming home to the blog to find more Ron Paul in the comments box.  I suppose if I didn’t want to read what his followers have to say I wouldn’t post about him.  What I do know is he a fascinating politician with a background that is almost impossible to track down.  You can find the easy stuff, anyone can.  The harder things like his writings while not in congress are harder to track.  It’s not just me saying it anymore either.

    I found the URL for this article waiting for me when I crawled into my online cave.  One of my readers thought I would enjoy it, and they totally underestimated the article.  I generally just skim these things, but this was more than political drivel.  It was a look at the man from outside the beltway.  It was a look at his followers, and at his nemesis’. 

   A lot of whats in here we already know.  Ron Paul wants you to be able to purchase a gun at 7/11, he doesn’t want you to be able to access abortions, and his stance on gay rights has never changed though he has softened his rhetoric.  It goes deeper though.  It explains how he won his elections to represent a small texas district against overwhelming conservative odds.  It explains why his constituents continue to vote for him, yet leaves out the things he’s tried to do for his district.  The author of this piece doesn’t seem like a fan, nor does he seem like an enemy.  What he appears to be is that most difficult to find human on the planet.  An unbiased journalist.

   What I really like is how sure Ron Paul is that he won’t win.  I had no idea that he originally intended only a four state campaign.  Lots of little tidbits like that.  Like I said, you’ve read a lot of hear, but this guy has grammar skills and punctuation and everything.

If you love Ron Paul….read this.  If you hate Ron Paul….read this.  If you are a fan of good journalism….read this.  none of you will change your mind, but you won’t leave this article disappointed.


lets do the news

July 17, 2007

  first the really important story…It’s a human interest story from the Grape Gazette.

Roscoe, fluffy and mollie seem to be hitting it off.  In fact I’m almost certain there may be a little inter-species lesbian thing going on if you know what I mean.  Roscoe is happy because someone speaks his language, mollie is happy because she has someone to snuggle with, and If I’m not mistaken the two of them being happy means FLUFFY IS A FREAK.

Maybe the rat bastards won’t kill me and grill me after all.

   the new intelligence estimate is out.  I’m willing to bet half of the readers here could’ve done as well.  Why do they always play politics with our security?  you would think on this at least they would all speak with one voice.  they can’t though.  You can’t be the most important if you agree with someone else.   Here’s the link…you shouldn’t bother…nothing new here

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070717/ap_on_go_ca_st_pe/us_terror_threat_39;_ylt=AjjTS5Ima.DS.aCafPZKAGsL1vAI

  Pakistan is trying to take the lead in the death by suicide bombing category from Iraq.  Man what a mess they are, and our assistant secretary of state is calling for more military action from Pervez .  Man, we do have some seriously militaristic type s running our country.  Unfortunately, the ruling party in the congress (the democrats) have no balls, so it will continue.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070717/ap_on_re_as/pakistan_74;_ylt=AjbIywqw550DxJcms7ct2jyWwvIE

I don’t know about you, but I love poker.  I’m a huge 7 card stud fan, but the game of choice has become texas hold ’em.  Probably because any idiot can figure it out.  It’s preschool poker, but its big time money.  The world series of poker main event final table is playing, and the winner is going home over $8M richer.  Only Lee Watkinsoon is recognizeable, and the players come from all over the globe.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19777938/

Harry Potter book available in its entirity online.  ok, this is really cool.   First….read the blue box on the left with the guys picture on it.  Then read the story.  Then go, well what the hell does that ….

http://redtape.msnbc.com/2007/07/pirates-say-the.html

In keeping with the Bush Administrations policy of attacking anyone anytime, parachutists jumped on the fremont prison in colorado.  I think its about time we attacked colorado.  whats interesting is these guys, when asked for identification gave the guards a paper that said they were defense department employees…that may not seem like much to you civilians, buut any former military man or woman reading this is going HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,289551,00.html

A pro wrestling story just for MDVP..its the chris benoit thing, and it lays out a pretty good run on how it all went down…Yes, he had steroids in his system

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/07/17/wrestler.murder/index.html

  I told you text messaging was from hell.  This story is one you gotta see…then tell your kids to watch it.

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2007/07/17/snow.texting.and.driving.cnn

Obama girl vs. giuliani girl…this is pretty dumb, but I’ve never linked to booty on my blog so here yuh go

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/offbeat/2007/07/16/moos.obama.rudy.affl

maybe the first step toward proving me right, Iran and the U.s will hold direct talks about Iraq in Baghdad.  The pauliacs will hate this, and Ron Paul must be shuffking his scare mongering feet a little too.

http://www.cnn.com/2007/POLITICS/07/17/us.iran.iraq.ap/index.html

ok, that does it for the news…lots of murders, a dude burned his wife to death, Michael Vick indicted for dog fighting (what an asswit he is), those nurses accused of spreading HIV in children in libya are getting their death sentences commuted to life in prison, etc. etc.  It just oges on.  I think next time I do the news I’ll only do the good stuff.  Which means this post would’ve been one paragraph long


the hue and cry

July 15, 2007

   Well the sunday of work more or less killed my random thoughts mood so I’ll try to whip that out later.  Right now I’m more thinking about the insanity I keep hearing on the news.  Shall we?

   Ok, Pauliacs, enough is probably enough, and you guys have really blown this one out of proportion.  I agree that he did not say that the government was planning bogus terrorist attacks.  It seems maybe I’m the only non-pauliac saying it, but thats no reason for you folks to blow a valve or something.  Cardiac care is important, and the old blood pressure is going through the moon on you guys .   Why don’t you discuss the rest of that insipidly stupid interview?  Or was that not your take on it?  I am up to my ears with the whole Ron Paul is the only candidate interested in liberty.  Lets look at his record.  He is interested in doing nothing.  Ever.  That’s what his interest is.  His voting record smacks of abject cowardice, and his hiding behind the constitution, a document that is to hard to change to gaurantee liberty for anyone let alone everyone, continues to wither with the populace.  Quit whining because he got misquoted.  Libertarians are notorious for misquoting anyone that doesn’t agree with them, and this year is no exception.

   Maliki said we could leave anytime we wanted, but today one of his aids translated that to “we want you to stay as long as you want and train our troops.”  Nice.  Wonder which cloak and dagger clown the white house sent to Put Maliki in his place?  If anyone thought he wasn’t our trained lap dog, this should change your mind on that.  Our seating an “elected” government in Iraq is maybe the dirtiest thing we have done over there.  They are making no headway, or effort, to reach the benchmarks established by “us” again.  Is Iraq now the 51st state or something?    Bring home the troops…let the humanitarian disaster begin.

   It’s not Iran, it’s Pakistan dummies.  While its possible the pauliacs are right, and George Bush really is dumb enough to enter open conflict with Iran, the good bet from a security stand point is Pakistan…here’s why.

Israel showed at Osirak that they are not going to let a muslim country have nukes.  They won’t let Iran either if it comes down to it.  They only listen to us if their security is not directly threatened, and Israel has always felt that a middle east nation with the bomb is a direct threat to their existence…which it is.  They have the bomb, so it’s a little hypocritical to say others shouldn’t, but I’m kind of an Israel fan so I don’t mind a little hypocrisy.

Pakistan has the bomb.  Several attempts have been made on Musharrafs life.  The al qaeda #2 has given us the three warnings notification required by the Quran.  Osama showed up on a video tape.  Whether he is alive or dead is an academic question. All the portents are there, and al qaeda has called for holy war against the pakistani government.

If we are going to invest ourselves in open conflict anywhere it really needs to be there.  Thats the threat.  We can defuse the Iranian issue with diplomacy, and a slow but coming withdrawal from Iraq.  Al Qaeda and the Taliban have proven they can’t be talked to, and its time to finish the little mess we made there.  Sorry pauliacs and messiah…you’re gnashing of teeth and rending of flesh over your projected Gulf of Tonkin incident makes no sense in the big picture.  Of course, Bush has proven he isn’t a big picture guy.

   These pesky muslims really have us chasing our tail don’t they?  We never learn from our mistakes, and this is proof of it.  When you get a snake by the neck you choke it until it is dead, dead, dead, you don’t let it go to see if it will bite you again.