another candidate quiz

September 18, 2007

  Here is another one of those quizzes designed to tell you which candidate most agrees with your values.  My Top Republican was Mitt Romney, and my top Democrat was Chris Dodd.  The Romney thing had me choking the hell out of myself.  It really is true.  You can’t choke yourself to death.  I did achieve unconsciousness though.

The most gratifying part of the quiz was that Barack Obama came in dead last…right behind Ron Paul and Dennis Kucinich.  Apparently I can still spot a whackjob a mile away.


What is a Pauliac? (quiz)

July 12, 2007

  Pauliac: paw-lee-ack  A zealous follower of Ron Paul, manifesting itself primarily on the internet, but can also be found scattered across the Northern Mexico Territory of Texas, and in small enclave’s scattered across North America.

How To Tell If You Are A Pauliac

Each yes answer is worth one point.  Scoring is at the bottom.

1.  Have you voted more than once in the same online poll?

2.  Does your reading comprehension decrease when you read something negative about Ron Paul?

3.  Have you caught yourself saying “but the other candidates are worse” in lieu of an actual point in an argument about Ron Paul?

4.  Do you own more than 7 handguns and belong to a militia?

5.  Do you think racism is blown out of proportion, and not really relevant in todays society?

6.  Have you ever drooled more than a quart while on one of your famous tirades about the magnificence of Ron Paul?

7.  Do you think libertarian means “the complete destruction of the federal government” in favor of a totalitarian regime led my the miniscule marvel?

8.  Have most of your friends stopped talking to you, and do your neighbors drive around the block rather than have to wave to your crazy ass?

9.  Do you believe taxes should be like the earth….flat?

10.  Have you ever when locked in your bathroom reading Ron Paul Today with your pants around your ankles thought, “man he is such a hunk?”

11.  in your Ron Paul loving lexicon, is liberal defined as “gay” and is conservative defined as “fascist?”

12.  Do you think criminyjicket is the wisest blogger on the face of the earth?

if you answered yes to 12 questions you are utterly confused, and not allowed to vote because you are currently incarcerated in a penal or mental institution.

if you answered yes to 11 questions you are not only a pauliac, but are also being sought by the law in at least four states, and by unwed mothers in at least three others.

if you answered yes to between 6-10 questions you are a garden variety Pauliac.  There is no hope for you.  You will spend the next 1.5 years walking in the shadow of his vainglorious personage, utterly convinced he has a chance.  You will spend the 4 years after that saying “things would have been different if Ron Paul hadn’t been ignored by the media.

if you answered yes to between 3 and-5 questions you are a pauliac, but you’ll get over it when you realize that he is just another politician.

if you answered yes to 2 questions, and neither of them was number 12, you are a liberal.  You just haven’t figured out yet that Ron Paul Hates You.

if you answered yes to only one question and it was not number 12, you are a centrist.  Once it all sorts itself out you will vote for the democratic candidate that wins the primary.

if you answered yes to only one question and it was number 12, you are either a blood relative, incredibly bright, or are sucking up to me in hopes of suckering me out of something later.


who is your candidate? (quiz link)

July 8, 2007

  so there is a quiz.  I didn’t bother to read how scientific it is.  i just wanted to see what happened.

http://www.selectsmart.com/president/2008.html

if you go to that link you get a 25 question quiz asking you how you stand on issues and personal data for a candidate.

here are my centrist results.  Mdvp is gonna hang me.

1.  Theoretical Ideal Candidate   (100%)
2.  Dennis Kucinich   (61%)  Information link
3.  Hillary Clinton   (55%)  Information link
4.  Joseph Biden   (53%)  Information link
5.  Barack Obama   (53%)  Information link
6.  Christopher Dodd   (52%)  Information link
7.  Alan Augustson   (52%)  Information link
8.  John Edwards   (52%)  Information link
9.  Al Gore   (49%)  Information link
10.  Wesley Clark   (49%)  Information link
11.  Rudolph Giuliani   (47%)  Information link
12.  Michael Bloomberg   (47%)  Information link
13.  John McCain   (43%)  Information link
14.  Mitt Romney   (42%)  Information link
15.  Ron Paul   (42%)  Information link
16.  Mike Gravel   (39%)  Information link
17.  Tom Tancredo   (39%)  Information link
18.  Bill Richardson   (36%)  Information link
19.  Duncan Hunter   (34%)  Information link
20.  Kent McManigal   (34%)  Information link
21.  Elaine Brown   (30%)  Information link
22.  Jim Gilmore   (29%)  Information link
23.  Tommy Thompson   (29%)  Information link
24.  Mike Huckabee   (24%)  Information link
25.  Newt Gingrich   (23%)  Information link
26.  Chuck Hagel   (23%)  Information link
27.  Fred Thompson   (22%)  Information link
28.  Sam Brownback   (22%)  Information link

oh well, i called em as i seen em.    guess i’m a whacko liberal.  Probably because i said legalize dope.  I’m really not sure how this happened.  I think it may be flawed. maybe how i rated the importance or something.  I was gratified to know i really don’t like Ron Paul.  I’ll tag it for Tsoldrin.  Even more gratifying was that they agree…i don’t like any of them.