It’s sunday again. Time for more random thoughts from the thoughtless. If you are easily offended hit the out button. My blog has been caterized, and I’m decidedly cranky.
1. our schools are in disarray, our infrastructure is crumbling, and we have over 500 varieties of beer to choose from. I don’t see a problem here.
2. I feel that tarring and feathering should be part of the criminal code, and this is when it should be used.
3. Roscoe chewed through the wires on my cable box. This was either a suicide attempt or a murder attempt. Either way it was poorly executed, since we are both still alive.
4. I would like a bagel with everything so i can go put it under the tire of my car and run over it. It’s like hanging someone in effigy. It packs no punch, but you get to feel like an idiot.
5. If whites and blacks can’t agree that dogfighting is bad, what hope have we of agreeing on anything? I think blacks only find dogfighting to be ok when its a famous black person. Kind of like the whole O.J. and murder thing. It kind of bothers me that this has been made racial.
6. Give me a hammer, a paring knife, a roll of duct tape, and a fifth of anything with a spanish sounding name, and I’ll make McGuyver look dull normal.
7. I’m not pleased with the way random thoughts is going today, but at least my Tourettes Syndrome appears to be in remission.
8. 19 million people in Bangladesh and India think Al Gore is a dumbass, and I’m smart as hell…more global wetting issues.
9. sex is overrated and underutilized.
10. that being said, you may disrobe now.
11. While it may seem cute, buying your newborn a shirt that says “now that I’m safe I’m pro-choice” is a fashion no-no.
12. I’m to sexy…well, I’m not but this is:
my son taught me how to do that. It has come to my attention that being blog illiterate is not safe. If only for self defense I need to know how to do more than just type blithering idiocy. That clip was bastardized from the world of warcraft. All I can say is that is not a proper form of birth control, but probably works in the abstinence category. I’ll credit this later…he didn’t get me the URL.
13. Locking your pets out of your room almost gaurantees a decent 3 hours of sleep. At which time they will decide they miss you and start fighting like children. I’m not sure why one of them isn’t already dead. Dog? Rabbit? I want some gotdam blood.
14. Dale Jr. won the pole at pocono, Wisconsin is ranked 7th in the preseason poll, some steroid infused monstrosity hit his 755th home ron, and A-rod got to 500 faster than anyone ever has. Oh, yeah, some hockey for Janie. Edmonton is going to pay Dustin Penner 21.25 million over 5 years. Dustin is a 29 goal scorer. call it 30 and 21 million for argument. Thats $140,000 per goal. 10 dollar hookers definitely got into the wrong line of work.
15. Blogs I read everyday at least once are listed in the blogroll. The one blog I refuse to miss on sunday, is Anita’s. She prays.
16. I’d send y’all over to Ration Reality, but on sunday mornings they read chicken bones, beat up small fur bearing creatures with tire irons, and sacrifice virgins to Loki.
ok, thats enough of this. Hope your weeks went well, and if they didn’t their will be better times than these.